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the highlight of the fair was when john decided to push me into jeniapos;s apartmentapos;s bushes.
only he tripped over his broken flip flop and took off the top part of his big toe.
because he tripped, he shoved me harder than intentioned and i was launched over the bushes. My feet and hands in the air. My back in the dirt.
it was fucking hilarious though.
next year = the fair with more money and beer. And weed.

house parties in denton are not as fun as they were back in the day. The shiner black keg was good, too bad it didnapos;t last.�
oh well, we all got sufficiently drunk.

hpb did me good yesterday.
finally got kozmic blues and retrospective.
yessssss.
thanks, boyfriend.

oh yeah and john tried to shoot a roman candle at me today and started a brush fire.
what a gaaaaaaay.

i dunno what else to write about.

i hate bitches.
and the things they bitch about.
and their ugly faces.
thatapos;s about all.

bowl, here i come.



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Tjah, omaapos;s medicijnen slaan dus niet meer aan, en ze heeft nu zelf aangegeven dat het �cht over is voor haar. Ze wil niet meer, ze kan niet meer. En mijn familie ziet dit nu eindelijk ook.
Morgen hebben de kinderen van oma, oma en de dokter een gesprek. Ik denk dat oma deze week nog het ziekenhuis uitgaat.
Ze heeft aangegeven niet bij mijn tante meer in te willen trekken omdat ze zichzelf te ziek vind voor mijn neefje en nichtje, wat ik kan begrijpen.
Mijn moeder heeft aangeboden dat ze, als ze het ziekenhuis uit gaat ze gewoon weer naar haar eigen woning gaat en dat mama bij haar intrekt voor zolang het nog duurt. Dit vind ik zelf een goed idee als oma wel iets van pijnstillers heeft. Als ze dat niet heeft ligt ze in haar eigenhuis weg te kwijnen van de pijn, en ik denk dat ze daar zelf ook niet zoapos;n zin meer in heeft.
Dus ik ben bang dat er morgen een keuze gemaakt gaat worden tussen tijdelijk thuiswonen en euthanasie, of misschien een combinatie.

Aan de ene kant hoop ik haar nog levend te zien, aan de andere kant, als ze vorige week al nieteens meer zelf kon lopen, hoe erg zal ik dan nu van haar schrikken als ik haar zie?

Ziet het er toch nog naar uit dat ze kerst op een andere plaats viert dan bij ons.

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Yesterday was quite the surprise. I love chocolate gummy bears. And surprise visits. And bouquets of brightly colored flowers, accompanied with light kisses.
However, I severely dislike his mood swings, how clingy he gets (sometimes), how he disapproves of a couple of sips of beer that I�sometimes take and how he doesnapos;t like sleeping over because he misses his bed. Weird.

On a different note, I havenapos;t gone to class at all this week. I only went to Chem lab yesterday and Iapos;m only going to MCB and Latin today. Iapos;d better catch up on Classics and Chem; my midterms are coming up soon.

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Which means one more year till i can do whatever i want whenever i want. Its pretty much that way now but of course there are limits... Actually not really. Okay so not much is going to change but its nice to know that if my mom DID say no to something i wanted to do (never does) i wouldnt have to listen to her. :) i hope i get a car for my eighteenth birthday. Speaking of which i need to take my driving test.

i get to see jake the day after tomorrow. :) and i have no school that day either thankfully. I really need a nap. My bed looks so cushiony and fluffy and comfortable right now. Plus max keeps trying to sleep on me while im at my computer so heapos;d probably lay down with me too if i did sleep.

i found that hoapos;s myspace. She will remain nameless. I was surfing myspace pages (im not a stalker) and i saw her. Of course her page is on private but i did see she was pretty damn ugly. Well... At least her default was. I expected her to be this gorgeous bitch, but sheapos;s not. Which makes me feel a little happier.

that was a really bad thing to say, wasnt it?
oh well. I dont care. She can go get hit by a car for all i care.

in other news, i also get to hang out with sammie this thursday after school. :) i havent seen her in a while. And i have no homework tonight. Which is good. And bad. Cause im bored and have nothing to do. My room is completely clean.

sigh.

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continued abbreviation

O que voc� faria se olhasse a morte de frente? Entraria em p�nico? Provavelmente. E mesmo que ela estivesse ali para alert�-lo sobre a sua conduta, ficaria t�o paralisado que sequer poderia fazer algo a respeito. Certo? E se ao inv�s da sua pr�pria morte, vislumbrasse a morte daquele que mais ama? Se visse diante de si a perspectiva de n�o poder ver de novo aquele que est� sempre ali � sua volta, e que muitas vezes � negligenciado sem que voc� sequer se d� conta disso? Se entendesse que amanh� aquela pessoa n�o estaria ali para ouvir nada do que tivesse a dizer, ainda que merecesse um pedido de desculpas ou uma declara�o de amor ? Alguns ainda assim ficariam paralisados. Outros tentariam aproveitar o pouco tempo que resta. Quem sabe at� pudessem mudar algo do que fosse acontecer ? Quem sabe pudessem fazer valer a pena um dia juntos, mais at� que uma vida inteira ?

vivemos imersos demais em nossos pr�prios umbigos e em nossos problemas para refletirmos o quanto agimos equivocadamente a torto e a direito.


Thayanne Maciel

�

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You were like sand, sifting in and out of my fingers. The moment I thought I had you, I lost you. I lost life, because I lost your life. Itapos;s still hard to look back and say, "Yeah, sheapos;s been gone for 4 years."�I think itapos;s so hard to say it, because I donapos;t want to. I donapos;t want to except the fact that I donapos;t know you anymore, primarily because I donapos;t know myself.
I use art as an excuse, you know. When I begin to draw, or paint, I hide away. Iapos;m in my own world and out of this one. Itapos;s sad, I know, but itapos;s true. If it wasnapos;t for your death, I wouldnapos;t have discovered art in the first place. I suppose itapos;s the only thing that Iapos;m grateful for.

I had to learn to fend for myself. Live for myself. Grow for myself. You were my shelter I hide under, you were the words that gave me strength.

Without you, Iapos;m nothing anymore... Iapos;ll see you when I see you and Iapos;ll love you more.

You were the best Grandmother I could have ever asked for. I love you.
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Iapos;m in the winter of my first year and I still have not had the mayor stop by to drop off the second piece to the quilt. What the heck am I doing wrong? Iapos;ve got a level 3 home, level 1 coop barn; 4 silk worms, 1 chicken and a foul. Iapos;ve have a daily income that showed the harvest sprites pop-up do a little jig in the end and when I had 11,000+ in shipments I got a congrats sign but no mayor the next day.... What gives?

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